Wanna join our Monster Cynics’ Club? We are now accepting applications. How to do it? Just add your definition below :) DENTURES:
Two rows of artificial ivories that may be removed periodically to frighten one’s grandchildren or provide accompaniment to Spanish music.
DNA:
A complex organic molecule characterized as the building block of life and appropriately shaped like a spiral staircase to nowhere.
FIBER:
Edible wood-pulp said to aid digestion and prolong life, so that we might enjoy another six or eight years in which to consume wood-pulp.
A stately manse occupied by transients who continually receive visitors but lack the energy and inclination to entertain them.
Every "Hormone Hostage" knows that there are days in the month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and he takes his life in his hands. This is a handy guide that should be as common as a driver’s license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend or significant other.DANGEROUS: What’s for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
DANGEROUS: Are you wearing THAT?
SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown.
Or the top ten signs your parents were hippies in the 1960s.
10. You were baptized with bong water.
9. You find out you have 37 half sibings.
8. They don’t trust anyone over 65.7. When reminiscing about your birth, mom rates epidural as "weak, man".
6. Their idea of a drug talk is to tell you "If you’re going to do pot, smoke it! Brownies are a waste of good pot!"5. They only time they showed up at grade school was when your 4th grade class was tie-dying t-shirts.
4. No line is long enough to fill in your whole name: Sunshine Rainbow Butterfly Stardust Mary Jane Joplin Smith.
3. Your parents had your baby earth shoes bronzed.
2. The moment of your conception is featured in the movie of Woodstock.
1. All the house plants have funny looking leaves.
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